Enough

I have fucking had it. I shouldn't be reading Michael Yon's shit online but I was introduced to it by a wife who apparently thinks his shit has relevance. To be honest, I don't read the news, I don't watch the news, and I definitely don't want you to fucking text me to tell me the newest lie you heard on TV about troops coming home by Christmas. I am very sorry to have to tell my fellow Americans this....not everything you see or hear on TV is true. Oh, and practically nothing on the world wide web is accurate either.

I realize some of you are in shock right now and may not be able to continue reading. It's alright. Go back to watching Bravo, it'll make you feel better to watch some rich housewives fight about who came to whose party.

Here in reality, we have Michael Yon.

In his article, "Fool's Gold and Troops' Blood", it basically makes my husband (and all medevac soldiers) sound like a coward and his unit and ALL medevac units inept. Seriously, I realize you are imbedded and all and you 'know what war is' because you are there, but do not bad mouth my husband with your ridiculous insinuations. The Army will not change it's policy and you writing your crap about the Golden Hour and insinuating that pilots have a choice is absurd. My husband is a hero and he will go wherever he is told no matter what the danger to save a soldier or a civilian.

Shame on you, Michael Yon, for trying to belittle my husband's mission. The number of lives saved by my husband's unit is countless and I am damn sure it's more lives saved than your written words.

Bittersweet

Finally received an email from my hubby today, after 4 days. I was getting a little antsy. I know, I know, I can hear Shawn's grandmother now..."Mont was gone for 3 years and I got a written letter about once a month."

Sigh.

Hubby is pretty sad about missing Blake's 9th birthday. 9, really? My kid is NINE?!?!?! Not only is my kid 9, but Thanksgiving is coming up and I have never cooked a turkey. Ever. Shawn does that. I am in a halfway melancholia...the only thing keeping me going right now is the prospect of Christmas in TN with all my brothers, their kids, my mom and my grandparents. Deployment without family close for holidays sucks. As of right now I have no feeling to make Thanksgiving dinner. It just seems so sad at this point to celebrate without Shawn here.

Hopefully next week will be better.

Your kids are your mirror

My son is his father.

It's actually quite hilarious. He seems sulky but actually he's just as happy as can be. He plays alone and is absolutely fine about being alone, he usually prefers it.

He really doesn't talk much, unless he finds something very unusual or interesting or wants to tell a joke. Social situations allude him and it's like pulling teeth to get him to join in.

He conforms to nothing that society might think is odd or unpopular. Yesterday he tried to wear pajama pants to school and looked very confused when I told him to change.

The compromise was that his long black socks were with shorts. Not only did he NOT care, he had no inkling that it may look strange.

Today his socks did not match. It was effortless on his part, finding socks. It was also effortless to put them on.

When I mentioned to him that his socks did not match, he said, quite put out, "You told me to go put socks on."

It's quite endearing, to have 'Shawn' here, although he is far away.

I've called Blake Shawn multiple times, because he looks soooo much like his dad, especially since his Uncle Neil cut his hair the same. But Haydon has Shawn's demeanor, which is even harder to separate.

His teachers call him "Mr. Happy". Too funny.

Influence

I have an amazing friend who blogs all the time and reading it lifts my spirits. Every time I read her posts I feel close to her, as if she doesn't live thousands of miles away. My new goal is to blog more, not only for my husband to read since we have so little time to talk, but also so that my friends who are far may feel closer to me. Aww, sensitive moment, sigh, sniff.

Now on to the nitty gritty shit of life...

We have indirect neighbors who seemed nice when they moved in but, alas, I am not a great judge of character. These kids are assholes, and, with that note, so are their parents (if/then). My direct neighbors have had many encounters with the kids and, yet, the parents are never home to talk to.

A couple of weekends ago Blake was playing with a boy from the street behind us. In NM, we don't have "fences" per say, but block walls, which the kids walk on to move from house to house. This boy's backyard is diagonal to our backyard. One lazy Sunday I was still in my pjs at 3 pm, happily cooking our meals for the week while the kids played in the backyard. My kitchen faces the backyard, so I can see everything that is happening. Of course, I did not see what happened this particular day.

Blake runs into the kitchen: Mom, look how cool this is!

Me: What? It's just a plastic, broken plate with holes in it.

Blake: No! I let my friend shoot it with his pellet gun! Isn't it awesome?

Me: You let WHO DO WHAT?!?!?!?!

Deep breaths. I did not let on to Blake how upset I was. As I looked up I see said child, one year older than Blake, walking the wall back to his house with I can only assume is a rifle. No, it had no orange tip.

So, I find a neighboring adult (not asshole parent) to watch my kids while I walk my happy little ass over to the house of artillery (HOA). When I arrive, I see two older boys, one being an indirect neighbor asshole-child, and the other is the rifle-carrying one's older brother. These two older boys both have pellet guns in the backyard and are shooting them into the sky. In a neighborhood. With homes not 10 ft away. With my 5 year old twins right behind that backyard.

So, more deep breaths and I tell the mom the story. She totally doesn't care. She actually tells me that on their 3rd warning from the police about the guns (b'c they have no orange tips so they look like real rifles) that they mentioned there would be no more warnings and that she would start being fined. Grrreeeaaat.

She then tells her son he is on restriction, and he almost immediately starts throwing a silent fit, kicking things around in the garage, and this is her response to him-

Mom: Don't be so hard on yourself.

Kid: *silently* kicks around more things in garage

Mom: It's over, no one got hurt. It's ok. Don't beat yourself up about it.

Kid: still kicks and hits things in garage

So, I walked home in stunned silence. Stunned.

Later that night I had a talk with Blake and grounded him. I laid it on thick and showed him the plate and asked what his brother or sister might look like with a half-dollar sized hole in them. Finally, he cried and I felt triumphant. Then I went a step further and asked him how he thought his dad would feel if I called him in Afghanistan and told him that his son had let a boy in our yard with a gun...with his little brother and sister outside around that gun. He sobbed.

I felt much better.

I think I may be turning into Kenny Russell. I never once raised my voice. A little scary.

On a happier note I put Blake back into MMA. Just in case he has to kick the kid's ass from the HOA. Just sayin'.

Top 10 things to NOT say to an Army Wife

10. "Since the President is pulling troops out of Afghanistan, will your husband be home early?"

Um, no. What that means is the troops ALREADY SCHEDULED to come home aren't being replaced. So, since he just arrived, he will not be coming home tomorrow.

9. "At least he's not in Iraq."

Really. I didn't realize it was safer in Afghanistan.

8. "I don't know how you do it, that's a long fucking time."

This intended compliment is really annoying. I do it because I have to, I have to stay strong for him to complete his mission and stay focused.

7. "How much longer does he have before he can get out?"

Who the hell knows? I don't, and really don't care, since that is not my top priority right now.

6. "My husband had to go out of town for a week so I TOTALLY know what you're going through."

There's no explanation for this sentence.

5. "You really miss him, huh?"

Actually, no, I never think about him. What a dumb thing to ask.

4. "But he'll get to come home for Christmas, right?"

No, you have seen the news and know the answer. Please stop asking.

3. "I understand, I am a single mom, too."

Yeah, no. Not the same.

2. "Where is that? Is it dangerous?"

I realize that most non-military people might not know where specific places are but maybe you should know that Kandahar is in Afghanistan. Just maybe.

AND THE #1 THING TO NEVER ASK AN ARMY PILOT'S WIFE

"Did you hear on the news about the helicopter crash in Afghanistan...yeah, everyone was killed...what helicopter does your husband fly?"

Sigh

We have been going on-stop and I haven't had time to get to the site. Shawn is doing okay although he says the food is terrible. Apparently one of the boxes I sent arrived covered in ants and some of the food was destroyed. He did not seem as upset as I was.

I am trying to keep the kids busy which means not staying at home which means the house is always trashed. I am sure this also has to do with apathy on my part, since my husband is gone.

Other than that, I am counting down the days until school starts and some other adult can entertain my kids so I don't have to continually think of things to keep them happy and from fighting so I don't end up in the asylum.

The other evening I was at the end of my rope and Maren started screaming BLOODY FRIGGIN MURDER in the backseat so I immediately pull into a parking lot and throw the van in park to yank her out and beat her ass. Turns out she dropped her taco in her lap and it was hot. Yeah. After consoling her (no, I promise I didn't beat her) I get in and throw the van into drive and immediately run over a concrete obstacle in the middle of the parking lot, which I did not see before because of the screaming child. At this point I can barely speak, I get out of the van and try to check to see if anything is wrong with it, but it's 102° out, plus heat rising from the asphalt...so I just threw a fit, jumping up and down, screaming as many expletives as I could muster in the horrid heat. Here's the irony: Approximately 60 days into Shawn's first deployment, when Blake was a baby, I ran the side of my van down the interior wall of a building in Germany. No, I was not drunk, I just could not get the van off the wall once I hit it, the curve was so tight. And then a gate shut behind us and we were locked in the park house for about an hour. But that's another story.

This story ends nicely. There is no damage to the van, it drives fine. I, on the other hand, may end up in the looney bin without prescription meds soon. This is why public school was invented, so mothers would not end up needing electroshock therapy. Although walking around in your robe and slippers all day playing games in your head like Martini seems quite a sweet dream...except for the Nurse Ratched part. Maybe McMurphy will save the day.

Time much?

My mom arrives in 19 days and my house is T-R-A-S-H-E-D. Between now and then I have maybe 2 days where nothing is going on. 2 days! And I want to rearrange my kitchen because it's driving me mad AND I really want someone to buy my dining table to get it out of the house!!!! I am in definite Sagittarius character for rearranging with no one to come home and stare.

Except...my mom is coming and none of the things I want to happen are happening! Maybe if I got OFF MY ASS and off the computer I would get some shit done. Hmm.

Perspective

I know that many people in the Southeast have been devastated by tornadoes. That is the reason why, when I found out that shingles were missing from my roof I did not freak. I left some messages yesterday (5) and received no return calls. Today I went to check the roof since the wind HOWLED all night and I just knew I was missing more.

I called ABQ roofing, and to my surprise, a man answered. I explained to him what I saw and he quickly surmised that the wood of the roof may be exposed and that he would send his guy out today. I was so grateful!

In the end, as I was about to pay, the very kind gentleman told me that there was no charge, just to thank my husband for his service.

Yes, I quickly had to retreat before I lost all composure. I have so much to be thankful for, including a patched roof.

Guilt

Yesterday I got a little talking to by my eight-year old. It went a little something like this...

Child: What are we doing this weekend? Is Daddy going to be home?

Me: Yes, Daddy will be home all weekend. Friday night we have a party for Daddy's work, Saturday we have the twins birthday party and Sunday Mommy and Daddy are going on a little date.

Child: Let me get this straight...my Dad is going to leave for a year in just one week and you are taking him away from me on Sunday?

Me: It's only for a few hours and you can have pizza and play on the computer.

Child: Eh.

Then child continued to pout heavily. So, of course I felt horrible and called Shawn right away, and we agreed we should not go on our date.

Well, I told this story yesterday to many girlfriends who were just adamant that the date continue and that you cannot let your children rule your lives and that your marriage should come first. Shawn was even a little confused with this, as was I. But we are going to go on our date! We could both use a little time away and to see a comedy. Thank goodness for my friends!

The Finest Drivers

I was terrified to drive in Germany. Terrified. The Autobahn scared the shit out of me, with BMWs careening toward my rearview mirror at mind-numbing speeds as I tried to pass a semi going 80 kph. I finally got the hang of it and so did the Germans, just passing me no matter what my speed when they saw my American Military car tag with a million stars on it...hard to miss. The cars in Germany don't even have cup holders because you aren't supposed to be doing anything but concentrating on the road. At speeds of 200 kph+ it's life or death for not paying attention. I would be interested to see the statistics of texting and driving in Germany, since I just saw what can happen at the speed of 15 mph (below).

I thought I'd seen crazy driving...and then I moved to NM. I seriously doubt many of the drivers here have even heard of a driving class, since I almost always get run over by people turning left at a two-way stop when I have the right-of-way. Even at a 4-way stop, people just go with the person in front of them, like no one is going to notice. Oh well. I digress.

I saw texting and driving at it's finest today, at the Elementary School no less. She hit the curb so hard that she didn't have time to correct and rammed right into the street light, bringing the light fixture from 50 feet up screaming down. Yep, not even 9 am, and she just drove off. I guess with the reputation of the state, she could've been drunk. At least my van that just got out of the shop is still beautiful with it's spankin' new paint job. Don't text and drive people.

#1 topic: Daddy

I spent all weekend listening to women who have never been a wife in the Army or know what the Army is tell me how to deal with deployment and what it is. It was very kind of them to put us up in a hotel and feed us, I guess that meant they had the right to talk to us like children.

Friday night, one hour after arrival,

Speaker (in a cheery sing-song that made me want to vomit): Okay! We are going to talk about rules! Everyone LOVES rules, right?! They give us boundaries!

Me (whispering to my neighbor): How much you wanna bet me it's no drinking?

Speaker: NOOOOOOO ALCOHOL! I know, alcohol makes us feel better, but it really doesn't let you be PRESENT, you know? You have to be present for all the GREAT information you are going to get this weekend!

By the time she had stopped talking many people had cleared the room to go and break rule #1.

I know that rule #2 was "No cell phones" but I had quit listening. All in all it was okay, the last day had the most information that was totally rushed through. Saturday we listened to hippy music and closed our eyes to go to our "happy place". Good times. We also did a Psychology 101 exercise that helped us figure out what personality type we were, and that was fun, but I have no idea how it tied into helping me cope with being the sole parent, house-fixer, bill-payer, car oil-changer and everything-under-the-sun for a year. Lots of laughs, though, since Shawn and I were TOTAL opposites. Another great opposite was the parenting session, where apparently everything I'm doing and have done and will do is absolutely wrong. Especially dialogue with the children. I really did try to change my word choice when we were having dinner, but, alas, all was for naught. *sigh*

The nice part was meeting Army wives that I haven't met. I've been missing that connection lately, since the only person who really knows how our world is about to be turned upside down is an Army wife. I even met some who can paint and use a drill. Although, my husband was vehemently against a drill-using lesson for me.

The kids got backpacks full of what-nots, including writing packets for letters to Daddy, and "Daddy-dolls". They are thrilled with their contraband, and haven't asked lately if Daddy is going to "fight the bad guys". I seriously don't know where they got that phrase, we have never mentioned anything but that Daddy is going to help people, just like he does here. I write "we" loosely, since I am not always around to censor what my husband says to my children. Maybe he should take the parenting class instead of me, the introverted recluse that he is.

...

I am beginning to NOT like talking on the phone. GASP.

I was on the phone all morning dealing with this pre-deployment weekend thing coming up. And I drove about 50,000 miles today for 3 errands because we live in BFE. And I saw a sign in my BFE neighborhood stating that there will be a meeting about building townhouses. Seriously?!

And I decided to drop out of my Bunco group. The thought of one more thing that I might possibly need a babysitter for just makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry.

I thought Spring Break was supposed to be relaxing. We've been on the go since Friday, when SB started, and will be gone most of the day tomorrow. I am exhausted.

And tomorrow I will be on the phone, all morning, again, trying to find a venue for a meet and greet for the unit. Go team.

Guilt trip

A few days ago my kids started whining in the car, where I couldn't get away from them, since the music never goes up THAT loud, about me never taking them to the zoo. An added bonus was that it was in 3rd person.

Maren: Mama never takes us to the zoo to see the animals.

Haydon: I know, we never get to see the animals.

Blake: We haven't been there in a loooonnnnggggg time.

Maren: Maybe we can go after church.

Haydon: Yay! After church we'll go to the zoo!

Blake: That's a great idea.

Well, it was decided. We actually did not go to church or Sunday School, since a tall, dark and handsome man showed up at my house around 11:30 the night before and stayed for breakfast. Poor guy, the kids hugged him and then went on their jolly ways, since he's never here anymore. Sigh.

But that's not where my guilt trip ends. At the zoo they tried to guilt trip me into letting them play at the playground there, but it is so hard to watch them with the million other kids, I always say no when I'm alone. Yes, this was AFTER they got to ride the train. Ungrateful, I tell you.

After the animal scene, we went to the shoe store to replace my Vibrams. Yes, I washed them once, like the instructions said, on warm. The glue came apart. It was pretty painless except for me being schooled by the pregnant hippie-child at the customer service counter. First she asked me what kind of detergent I use, and, of course, according to her, it was the wrong kind. I then explained that I have a front load washer and that it takes a specific kind of detergent, which apparently wasn't the greatest idea, since SHE WASHES ALL HER CAMPING SHIT BY HAND. At this point, my kids are being very good, but all I can hear is her berating tone of how to make my own detergent and how it's so much better for everything, and Blake and Maren are playing the touch-me-softly-and-I-won't-scream-very-loud-unless-it-hurts-game and Haydon is meticulously taking apart the plastic stand in front of the register with all the cards and fliers. I know I had a completely incredulous look on my face and I just interrupted her and said, "I have three kids so creating my own laundry soap won't work for me." She then went on to explain the ingredients and write them down for me. She was so kind. Really.

I did get my shoes replaced and the men in the shoe department were much nicer and didn't ask me what kind of soap I used to wash my body, which could in turn peel the glue out of my Vibrams to make them fall apart. That was a much better experience.

Picture post

Pinewood Derby

Red car is Blake's

Obviously Haydon is terrified of Lancelot after the big fight

All kinds of Awesome

I may have figured out a night of sleep without the alarm going off. The night after the 0530 wake-up, he did it AGAIN, this time at 1200. I really did think someone had broken in that time, since I never heard him bark, but woke up to the alarm. Nice. I put his ass in the laundry room and shut the door for the rest of that night. Last night I did it again. All was fine.

Except...

I watched True Blood before bed and all I could hear in my sleep was Bill saying "Sookie" in that sweet Louisiana accent and I kept waking up. Maybe no campy/scary vampire flicks before bed....yeah, right. It's too good to resist.

The better news is that Blake's arms are fine and not one twin is terrified of Lancelot like I thought they would be. Hell, they were both in his face just last night giggling like idiots. I told Haydon if he couldn't be nice and gentle to the dog, he would have to find a new home.

Haydon, that is.

Happy Friday!

One day at a time

Other than my apathetic demeanor, the morning started out like this yesterday

Lunchtime, Haydon gets gnawed on by the dog

Dinnertime, Blake had rolled his sleeves up so tightly that his right bicep was twice the normal size, look closely, you can see the bulge and the red stripes are the marks from his shirt that did not go away for hours

Before the dog incident, which Haydon provoked, because I saw him startle/hurt/scare the dog, I was baking for some therapy. It worked. I didn't worry about the laundry or toys or organization and just baked. It was nice. After I put the kids to bed I relaxed and gave myself a pedi during the newest episode of 'glee' and felt awesome when I went to bed.

All this was shot to hell when the house alarm went off at 5:30am. I'm pretty sure the dog barked and set off the 'window break' alarm because of the echo the living room makes.

All my girlfriends better get ready for many phone calls, since I cannot call my husband in theatre if I have a kid/dog/home invasion-freak out.

Apathy

I cannot seem to shake myself of the impending doom of deployment. My house is a wreck, my skin is a wreck, my eating habits are...crap. And, so, I feel like crap. I have some weird need to organize absolutely everything before Shawn leaves so I don't turn into the mom who forgets. Which is just laughable, since I forget everything now.

Pictures will follow soon showing my efforts in organization of the kids' closets, but child services would be called anonymously if I put those up now. I do not know where to begin with any cleaning endeavor, so I have enlisted a very nice lady to come clean my house on Saturday. I feel like a complete and total loser because of this, but also I am chomping at the bit and cannot wait for her to come.

The only control I feel I have in life right now is food. Yesterday I started Paleo again with a vengeance and vow to keep it up. Hopefully if I get my eating back on track I can find some piece of mind. I guess I never realized what an a crazy control freak I am. Huh.

BS

We are getting our taxes back soon and with Shawn's deployment, I want to get us on a budget and pay off our debt. So I goggled Dave Ramsey.

I signed up for the 7 day trial period and got started. The website is pretty user friendly, but after I entered my debts, there was no tutorial to tell me HOW to get out of debt. Such as, with what extra money do I use to pay extra on the credit card bill? Actually, I take that back. There were many stories of people never eating out and people getting second jobs. Um....no?

Am I seriously SUPPOSED TO ASK MY DEPLOYING HUSBAND TO GET A SECOND JOB?! Or, am I, with children in school, supposed to get a job? How is paying for daycare going to get me out of debt? Basically, I thought the whole thing was a crock.

There was one story of a man who got a second job AND miraculously "found" $500 extra in his account to send toward his debt, and he was debt free in 27 months. WTF?! His credit cards, his car, his student loan. Nope, not kidding. Also, he gave up everything and stopped eating out.

We do eat out many times, at about $25 a pop, since I refuse to pay expensive prices for my picky kids who won't even eat at McDonald's. Let me rephrase: they WANT to go there, but just for the toy. Furthermore, with my husband GONE FOR A YEAR, I know I will not cook 21 times a week. I'm sure good ole Dave would tell me to give up the gym and take my kids out of gymnastics, too, so we can all not exercise and eat cheap processed food and be more like what many Americans look like. But, hey, maybe I'd be debt free and fat by 2015.

Girl time

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1354727/Why-lunch-girls-beats-night-man.html

This article is so true~women friends are awesome and make us feel great. I just shared a much-needed girl's night out with some close friends and it was awesome! We all love our husbands, but sometimes girl time is what you need. Thanks girls.

Seeing Red for V-day

I let my kids dress themselves, which has rendered me criticism for awhile. I really don’t care what other moms think about how my kids are dressed. That they actually have clothes ON is an amazing feat, plus the fact that we are out in public because I have managed to get them out of the house. This is one of my battles to not fight. Even though Maren’s hair usually looks like a rat’s nest, I would take a rat’s nest over a screaming tantrum any day. These same people who say shit about how my daughter is dressed in mis-matched clothes or how her twin brother wears a paper-thin Spiderman costume in the middle of winter are one and the same with the exact look when I say “tantrum”. I realize some children do need a good spanking, but not over what they want to wear that day.

I used to spank, then went off spanking, then spanked again for awhile. Spanking can get out of control fast if the parent is out of control, and that is why I don’t do it anymore. That and the fact that it doesn’t work. Especially if you spank a lot. Blake once had a pre-school director who told me she never spanked with her hands because they were for loving, so she spanked her kids with a kitchen spoon. I’m no shrink, but I did take Psych 101, and that seems a little off to me, just a smidgen. This is the same woman who couldn’t figure out why Blake (at 2 years old) was in time-out everyday, at the feet of a beautiful, heavy-breasted, long-legged, twentysomething blond. Uh-huh.

Back to the spanking. I realized years ago when the twins were babies that I would see red every time Blake did a toddler thing that pissed me off. Once, instead of laying my hands on him (to put him in time-out), I walked away, almost tripped over a kid chair, which I promptly kicked to the wall. Yep, nice chunk out of the wall. Shawn was out of town and has been pretty much ever since, and I decided that something had to change with me (Thank-yew, Thank-yew, Psych 101).

Now I count (like Tinkerbell) and do really crazy shit to calm myself down, such as tell Blake that I am going to be angry if he doesn’t listen. It actually works. One twin gets it, but usually I am too late to talk her down, and by then I have to take an extra 5 minutes to stop the tears if her feelings have been hurt by her bitch of a mother. Yes, 5 minutes to talk to my kid...I could totally have watched a youtube video in that time.

Twin A, on the other hand, is the worst. He doesn’t listen and is unpunishable (like his older brother was at that age). I did put him in time-out the other day and he cried and cried. Then he got up and ALMOST did the same thing AGAIN that I had put him in time-out for. ALMOST. I asked him (not very nicely) if he wanted a repeat and he slunk off, seemingly defeated, but no worse for wear.

My life is stressful enough with my husband gone and about to be gone for an even longer time. Maren walks around town in fushia skirts and camo tights. Haydon doesn’t have shoes on half the time we leave the house. Blake is pretty much self-sufficient, which is good, since he can feed his brother and sister in the morning if I get distracted while watching old ‘glee’ episodes. He’s only 8, but he’s going to have a lot of responsibility when Shawn leaves. I probably do expect too much out of him, but, really, I am raising a man, not a boy. He gets to do plenty of boy things, like stay up until almost 9pm making block robots with his brother. Yes, the third time I climbed the stairs to read the riot act I was seeing red...until I witnessed them creating robots out of legos under the covers (like I wouldn’t be able to hear their hysterical giggles through the comforter). My red anger vision turned to red hearts, like the crack of a whip, as they were silent when they saw me. I tucked them back in, muttering empty threats about losing TV time, since I am a total follow-through-er. As I left the room I heard Haydon say to Blake, “We can just make more robots after school, we don’t need TV.” I smiled all the way downstairs, happy that none of their brain cells have been spanked out with a wooden spoon.

Maren's Valentine's Day outfit she picked out herself

the shirt says "Believe in Love"

she can't read, so I'm sure she picked it b'c of the hearts

My Poor Betsy

A Day in February

Things that happened to me today, not in this particular order:

• Watched a play in a different language that my daughter was in with her class
• Ran a 8:27 min. mile
• Cleaned up dog poop smeared into carpet
• Found out that the judge accepted my excusal for jury duty
• Tried to fix my thermostat, to no avail
• Almost cried on the phone to my oldest child's teacher for being an idiot
• Almost cried to my husband on the phone because the house was freezing and I couldn't get the heat to come on
• Did cry to my husband when I got into a car accident
• Got into a car accident

Everyone is okay with the accident. The van's right side is in pretty bad shape, but no injuries to humans. And, no, I was NOT texting or reading or talking on the phone while driving. Blake actually had my phone in the back, playing a game. Apparently, it is NM law to call an accident in, although according to my insurance company, you don't have to call if no one is injured. Good thing it is drill weekend and my hubby works with a lot of police men. Just a side note, the police officer who came to the house for the report was super nice and nothing at all like those meanies I met 11 years ago when I was arrested.

Accident=bad. Hubby came home early because of accident=good.

The Ugly Truth

I used to bitch and complain about parents who never read the newsletter I sent home, since news would be repeated for weeks at a time and then students would come to school without their book report they were supposed to have been working on for 6 weeks, or not come to school with their party supplies for the Christmas party, on the DAY OF THE PARTY.

Karma is a bitch. Today I am that parent. Blake's Valentine Party is today, this afternoon. I did not send him to school with his valentine's because I misread the newsletter his teacher sent home and just assumed the party was Monday. I have all the supplies to make cards this weekend with all the kids. We've been talking about it all week AND I even talked to Blake's teacher about it on Tuesday, like I COMPLETELY understood what was happening.

What is going to happen when Shawn really leaves? I'll tell you what. All three teachers of my kids will think I am the biggest loser as a parent, because if I can do this shit WITH Shawn in country, wtf will happen with him not?

I DID IT!

Wahoo! I quit facebook! After checking to see how many new responses everyone had today and getting NOTHING done, I finally just quit it!

I feel really good and hope that tomorrow and everyday after that is totally productive!

YES!

I CAN DO THIS!

Today all I did was one measly load of laundry, which I didn't even get put away before my husband came home. I did not clean the kitchen or anything else for that matter. Honestly, I do not know what I did. I know that I took a shower and brushed my teeth and went to the gym. 'Bout it. The rest of the hours of the day were spent creepily staring into the lives of others. I'm done. Shawn came home and could barely get to our bedroom due to the piles of laundry in the hallway. Yep, it's over! I probably still won't be the best housewife, or even a mediocre one, but I'll be a present one. Go team!

UGH!!!

Apparently while Blake and Haydon were playing oh so nicely this afternoon, one of Blake's drawers got broken. Under his bed. The one that is only held together by staples. Seriously? I can't get a straight story and Shawn is pissed.

For punishment, we decided to give Maren the room, just a go, really, to see how she likes it and make Blake squirm. Nada. Haydon was so excited at the prospect of sharing the bunk bed with Blake that he started moving toys, books, and all the shit he could carry.

I explained that this was a trial. Maren understands, and she was read the riot act about taking care of a big girl bed.

Basically, what we thought was punishment backfired. Now, I will be punished because I will have to paint a friggin' girl's room AND a boy's room. Oh, yeah. Haydon was already talking about how he could have monster trucks on his walls and Maren could have "those butterflies". Nice. Real effing nice.

SNOW DAY!!

Per my last post, we have been a tad under the weather. Blake has been the strong one, with many years of immunities! I am just back to feeling like myself and now Shawn is in the doldrums. Ah, winter. No better way to spend sick days at home than with a SNOW DAY!

I did not get any pictures of the beautiful snow in the front because I am a mom of three and am addicted to facebook. Also, I had some stuff I had to get into to Shawn's boss, so, alas, no pictures of outside.

I did, however, get a few pictures inside!

The kids dancing like Gru.

After dancing and some light cleaning, the kids asked me to make play-doh. I totally did. Are you proud?! I did something motherly! I am soooo proud. They played for about an hour and it was awesome.

There was one catalyst. See the creature in the middle of the floor?

Me: Whatever you do, you cannot let Lancelot have any play-doh. It will make him sick.

All kids: OKAY!

Me: What did I say?

Maren: Don't eat play-doh, it's gross.

Haydon: Yeah.

Blake: No, you sillies. Don't feed it to the dog!

Maren: Oh, right.

There is a blue spot (the color of the play-doh) of vomit that I have been trying to get out of the office carpet since this afternoon. He took it like a champ, though. He seems fine.

Ridiculous much?

Dec 18: Arrive in CO at inlaws, as Maren had been coughing most of the way there in the car. She vomits after dinner and most of the night, coughing so hard.

Dec 19: Constant coughing, not a break and Mucinex doesn't work.

Dec 20: Cough is broken up, less frequent

Dec 31: In Florida, Maren starts coughing mid-day. She goes to bed coughing.

Jan 1: On the road, Maren coughs all day, thankfully we are stopped every time she pukes. We make it to Biloxi, MS. She coughs constantly all night, rushing to the bathroom and now has a fever.

Blake has started coughing this day as well.

Jan 2: On the road, Maren coughs all day, though she doesn't vomit as mush, she has a constant fever that will not break with meds. Finally I find the thermometer and her temp is 103.5 under the arm. We stop in Dallas at the ER, where she is diagnosed with an ear infection and possibly strep, due to the vomiting.

Blake coughs all day, constantly.

Jan 3: Last day of car trip and Maren is better with meds and has a little appetite. Coughing is infrequent and so is vomiting.

Blake coughs all day, constantly. We finally arrive home and he is starving, we make a light dinner, which he immediately throws up.

Jan 5: Sent Blake to school, it is a short day, but he coughed so hard he threw up. Had to pick him up early.

Jan 6, 7, 10: Blake is at home, his cough is too bad to go to school and he also cannot go to jiu-jitsu. He cannot even run around at home, or jump on the trampoline, because he will cough so hard he will throw up.

Maren has been going to school, feeling great.

Jan 11 (1 am): Maren wakes up crying that her ears hurt. I give her drops and cover a heating pad and lay her on it. She continues to cry that her ear hurts, all night.

Jan 12: Send Blake to school with note that he cannot go to recess. Maren stays home and I take her in, double ear infection.

Jan 13, 14, 17-21, 24: EVERYONE GOES TO SCHOOL HEALTHY!

Jan 25: Get call from Maren's school to pick her up, she has a fever that has risen 1.o° while waiting. Take her home, give her Ibuprofen, she plays just fine.

Jan 26-27: Maren has a continual fever of 102.5-103.3. I take her in and it's viral. Push fluids and alternate Ibuprofen and Tylenol. Have to keep Haydon home too, he flat out refuses to get on the bus if she isn't going as well, though he isn't ill.

Jan 28: Maren is better, still under the weather but playing and has an appetite. I start to feel not so great. Haydon starts coughing.

Jan 29: Haydon wakes up with a fever and I medicate him all day. I wake up feeling terrible and medicate. Maren starts coughing and coughs constantly, every 8 seconds. She coughs all night, throwing up she coughs so hard.

Jan 30: Hopefully Shawn and Blake won't get it. They are out today, staying away from the sick house and getting fresh air.

Will this ever end? It is getting hard to be kind with sickness round the clock. I know they cannot help it, but it's annoying!!

Smoke and Mirrors

Wednesday of last week we left at 8:45 am and returned at 1:15 to a horrible smell. After showering and messing around, I went to make some coffee and saw that the knob on the stove was turned ever so slightly. Fantastic.

I went to the computer to research and everything said, "GET OUT OF THE HOUSE! NOW!"

BUT...I was in a bathrobe. The last time I had to call the Fire Dept. when the twins locked me out, it was right after I had been running on the treadmill. I was in teeny-tiny shorts and a teeny-tiny shirt, with an enormous amount of baby fat AND not one smear of mascara. Hell, no, I was NOT going to call them AGAIN, in a bathrobe.

We grabbed our stuff and went to a friend's house while the house aired out.

And yes, I'm sure it was on all night, since hubby was out of town. We are all alive, though. Yay.